In any team sport you need a team captain, in your life it is YOU. Your coach will be you higher power or whatever guiding principles you live by. You teammates are the people you count on to get goals/baskets/touchdowns. Some people will be your starting players while others will be on the bench as backup. Every season you host trials to select your team and it is important to note that not everybody makes every season. Such is life a great sport where we win some and we lose some.
I have always said that “we are born into the world alone (with the exception of being a twin, triplet etc.) but we were never meant to live in the world alone”, words quoted from a friend that have stuck with me over time. Anyways, what I am getting at is that whether we like it or not, we are all interdependent on one another/with various people no matter how independent we want to be or feel. It is not entirely possible to do this thing we call life alone.
I probably sound like I am talking about marriage and/or having a life partner – till death do us part type of situation. Unfortunately, I am unqualified for that conversation. It can be seen that way but it is not the be all and end all, if you get what I am saying. My point is that we all need some sort of support, to lean on other people and draw strength from them, but you do not have to go to bed with them, if you don’t want to anyways. Someone else I know would say we are always making transactions with other people, to get what you want/need in exchange for what they want/need.
Over my time in university, I realised that teamwork becomes more and more crucial the longer you are within, because varsity life is not always kind, the academic side of things, even student leadership, sports, clubs and societies, but of course these are the ‘leisures’ because you have a choice to do more, which can be rewarding at times. Anyways none of these things are possible if you are not in some sort of team. Being a part of something that requires you to think of others and not just yourself. It opens up so much and teaches you amazing things, not only about yourself but the multi-diverse types of people out there. It is beautiful. I am grateful for the many people I have had the pleasure of working with because we joined teams (momentarily) life becomes slightly more bearable when things are working out.
Continuing into worklife. The act of finding work, I am sure many would agree that many times the advantage (although not for everyone) is in knowing someone who knows someone. A chain of people who are collectively working to secure a position for you. Then there is the work itself, my work involves being with people every single day with zero exception. I might have my own job to do and to account for, but nothing would be possible without some team effort either from my students or my colleagues. Working with other humans means there will be days when you need someone to cheer you up because that one other person put you down. It means you will need someone to bounce your out of box ideas off of just to test for improvement. It means you will need someone who is a bit more efficient than you are to carry your load because they get it and you do not understand what the hell you are doing and you cannot get it done on time until you do. Many thanks to my work friends for putting up with me on a daily basis. Even my students who I tell to do things for me to make my life easier.
Here is the difficult part. Not all teams, transactions or friends are meant to last forever. Having a relationship that carries you through a difficult period in time can make you feel like you owe that person or those people something to show gratitude. It is understandable that letting go is a difficult thing to do but is also part of life. Closing one door is an opportunity to open a few others where you get to meet many new and interesting people on the other side.
Whether it is Max-Neef or Maslow’s Theory of Human needs, both agree that affection, a sense of love/belonging and esteem are exactly what makes life a team sport. I hope that you continue to find the best teammates that make the sport worth playing.
Thank you for your time in reading this blog post. Much love and appreciation!